“Your time
is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by
dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let
the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most
important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow
already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs
I was brought up by a father who constantly pursued truth and justice. It's actually what ended up killing him.
“What you perceive, your observations, feelings,
interpretations, are all your truth. Your truth is important. Yet it is not The
Truth.” Linda Ellinor |
What I have learned is that there is a level of shared truth but then the lines get blurry and it becomes incredibly fuzzy. And the truth (sorry I couldn't resist) is that people don't want to hear the truth. That's why we hear people saying: "I saw the signs and it was the first time in my life that I didn't trust my gut." What that means to me is that they didn't believe what they assumed to be the truth and when someone showed them who they were in the first 15 seconds, they decided that it could not be possible. Later, they will tell you what a great learning experience it was for them. But we try to give people the benefit of the doubt and that does not always bring us joy.
A friend was dating this gentleman for three months. She wanted an intimate relationship with him but he kept inviting her out to fancy dinners. After three months, they started having conversations and this dining relationship ended. The bottom line is that he wanted a companion and not more. He did not come out and spell it out and created unrequited feelings. I guess I am getting old but I am at a point in my life, where I want clarity from people and not games. Even if the person does not know themselves, they know what dating is about. Even if they were true to themselves, for me, they did not face the truth. The truth that someone else was involved who was ready for a healthy relationship. Live and learn.
I find in organizations, everyone knows the truth of what happens behind closed doors. But they stand behind the door and pretend. Why? Because most executives don't want to hear the truth. They focus on the metrics and pay lip service to the people side of what really goes on. It's a shame because there a few people who are exceptional leaders who know how to motivate and get the most out of the people they work with. The rest put on lipstick on a bulldog initiatives and deal with their own truth.
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