am back here in Santorini 10 years later, overlooking the most amazing view of the ocean. Once I got closer to town, I started to remember every detail from when I was here last in 1995 on my divorce party. Coming back has made me recognize my growth; a great accomplishment to celebrate.
am learning that it's okay to be on my own; there is nothing wrong with it. I am reading Marrying Buddha and there is a passage where Muju describes following his master for a year and how what he learned was simply to be through the quiet. I need to shut down the negative voice in my head and just love. The key is not to look but to be. By being, you see much more because your self is not absorbed with whether you are right or wrong. Goal: stop caring so much what other people think, including total strangers, about me. Don't let anyone intimidate me. I also have to overcome this shyness I've had since I was 6. That's when I remember the fears. Though for someone whose first life memory is a war, is it surprising that I have fears?
I met a 22-year old on the flight from Athens today. She was from Perth. I was meant to meet her. She was full of life and adventure. And she had lots of questions about marriage.
You can be so alone in a marriage or relationship. The beginnings are always so sweet and my endings so bitter and painful.
I am also reading The Voice of Knowledge and his theory is that people learn bad behavior by acquiring knowledge. As they get older, they learn what is expected of them. They lose all the innocence of childhood, which is all about being.
In my world, you need money to be but you have to figure out what you want to be to live your life. The journey is to figure out what I want and be at peace with it.
I just watched Winter Solstice on my laptop since I cannot play my US DVDs on the local DVD player. I love just being in my calm hotel room and doing what I want to do without feeling isolated or lonely. Just being on my own in peace.
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